driving along

uugh, damn it. i've been trying to type up an entry about inconsiderate people who slowly cross the street oblivious to the traffic that their impeading. i can't seem to get any thoughts out there without triggering the urge to buy a machine gun and hunt down these two people in the building.

long story short... they were crossing with subpar walking speed, drinking their caramel venti low fat frap from starbucks, talking, oblivious to the world around them. i get stuck on a left turn for 5 minutes (no exaggeration) waiting for these idiots to cross. they stop right in the middle, i honk, the idiot looks at me.

now my only assumption here is the simple fact that these people can make the connection that they're impeding my car from turning left because of (a) my blinking left turn signal and (b) their useless conversation in the middle of the street seems to be so interesting that they decide to stop and block every car waiting to turn left. the guy had the audacity to put his hand out in a "hold up, i'm talking here" position and carries on with their conversation. inconsiderate bastard!

must... calm... down... resist... urge... to... go... postal...

how depressing!

this time last year, i was in better shape. i was eating less and i was excercising more. i played tennis like a mad man, stopping everything and went on a tennis regiment.

it was all because of a tournament (that i lost on the first round). i look back at last year and i was in shape. i could play tennis for hours without even breaking a sweat. today, i get tired walking up the escalator. by the time i reach my desk, i'm panting like that asmatic kid in the wheel chair from malcolm in the middle. its not a pretty sight.

i think its time to start heading back to the gym and hitting the tennis courts again.

its sad really it is.

the only interesting thing i've done since my last post

my life has grinded to an existence of work and....uummm... work. the only interesting thing that i've done in the past week was actually going to the movies to see finding nemo. a great movie without the violence but with all the fluff that comes with a disney pixar movie.

i'm not about to give away any spoilers to the movies but the plot line was nicely summarized by frank as a combination of ransom and memento.

yo d00d! wuzzah?!

i have a completely different personality when i'm at work. i'm polite on the phone, i'm curtious and i help old ladies cross the street while carrying their groceries.

when i was younger i had a 50 cent personality. i liked the baggy pants, i liked throwing up gang signs and i liked talking ebonics. it was a facination that i will never understand to this day.

sometimes, i wish that the two worlds collided. actually only especially when i get irritated with dealing with people. i wish i could show a little gangstah, ala asian avenue.

annoying person over the phone: hi yea, can you give me the documentation so i can rewrite your application? (cause it sucks)
me: hello, uumm we didn't write any documentation because the client wanted it done 2 days from yesterday and it took 3 months of back and forth i haven't revised it in 3 years and it seems to work well.
apotp: well, the new people want to spruce it up. maybe a moving cucumber for the cafeteria menu or something.
me: what?!
apotp: so is it alright if we drop by now so you can show us where the code sits, what to edit, and where to migrate it into the production box. and by the way, we need access too. can you do that for us? thanks.
me: hold up m0f0! bac the fUk Up BiAtCh! DoN't NoB0Dy MeSseS wIt MuH CoDe. So TaKe YoUr SkImPy ReQuiReMeNTs BaK 2 YuR h0mEBoI aNd FiLl-OuT tHe WoRk ReQuEsT FoRm. m0f0!

guilty pleasures!

why can't i look away from the trainwreck that is the love life of j.lo and ben? my asian gossip gene is working overtime these days, me thinks.

damn it, i'm not smuggling filipino children to the US!

i went to seattle this weekend. nothing really interesting but it was great day trip. it was one of those on-the-spur momentary lapses of intelligence where ritchie and ben say, "hey i need a lamp that simulates sunlight because i have no windows in my room, lets go to seattle and see if a really expensive electronics store has it. if anything we can sit in the massage chairs for 15 minutes, fall asleep and get kicked out."

yes folks, although i didn't stumble my words as usual with the us marshal at the border. he still felt the need to assume a guilty-until-proven-innocent attitude and get our vehicle searched. we were inside and questioned if we were smuggling any of the following over the border:

• cigarettes
• endangered animals
• drugs, prescription and non
• filipino children

although we weren't smuggling any of the items over. our car still got searched; dog and everything. so in protest to "the system" i decided to smuggle as much items as i can going back. things i managed to smuggle through:

• a grey old navy shirt, worn over my green shirt
• an air purifier for my car, plugged into the cigarette lighter
• an anime dvd, tucked under my seat
• 36 krispy kreme doughnuts (3 boxes), in the trunk

yes, i'm a rebel. fight power. down with the man. flower power dude!

yay for something!

so i think my luck is finally running out. all my friends in san francisco have been getting laid off left and right. i've averted getting laid off primarily because i work for the government. but the past few months our union has called for a strike vote. so i probably won't get laid off, but end up going on strike or getting locked out.

last night i went to my area's union meeting to vote. not until they had the chance to fill our minds with a "rah-rah we hate icbc!" which isn't really a big deal for me since i was already pretty dead set in how i was planning on voting (hows that for cryptic).

when the meeting was over the floor was opened up for blogger fodder comments. everyone who took the stage wanted to elicit a reaction from the crowd. they were trying to be motivational and inspiring while trying to rally everyone behind the union. its too bad that most people who work here are socially awkward and incoherent anyway.

if any union people are reading this... my name is ... erm....edward southam. right! thats it, edward southam.

i'm not dead...

i haven't fallen of the face of the earth. i haven't gone on hiatus. i haven't run off to alaska to hunt seal and live in an igloo. trust me, finding amusing things to blog is quite hard when you're life isn't that amusing. i need a vacation.