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Vancouver Winter Olympics 2010

It’s here. Starting this Friday the Winter Olympics will be upon Vancouver and hopefully it will not turn out to be a glorious gong show.

Normally, I would be completely neutral to the idea of the Olympics and in the correct circumstances I could be enticed to be excited about it. The reality of the situation is I’ve never really been excited about any Olympics (Summer or Winter) and could probably care less. The fact that is in Vancouver an additional “pro” in the list because you get to see things first hand. So I should be excited and in full participation mode correct?

Not really. There are a few things that affect my situation.

1. I hate crowds. I hate being inside a crowd and I don’t like being in contact with people in the crowd. I’m a bit of a germaphobe, I know.
2. I don’t like getting forced into “fun” things. Forced fun is definitely not my cup of tea, I actually go out of my way to avoid the forced fun type of activities.
3. When I’m tired, lacking sleep and/or haven’t kick-started my brain I do not like interacting with people.

So now let me also explain that since moving to Richmond my plan was to drive in but because of the Olympic chaos in downtown Vancouver (road closures and huge crowds) it is safer and more cost effective to take public transit. Public transit causes me to face two out of three issues on a daily basis. This contributes to my general dislike of the whole Olympic situation because it just magnifies the amount of people that I already don’t like dealing with.

Now most people would probably say that I should just accept and support the Olympics since it’s here. To that I say, no. Would you allow a bully to keep bulling a child just because they already have their fist to their face? I think not.

ps. That being said, I’m planning on spending the Olympic time at home watching re-runs of Lie to Me, West Wing and Veronica Mars. I’m not going to go around ruining it for everyone just because I don’t like it.

11:39 am 0 Comments

Ritchie vs The Idiot Drivers of Richmond, BC

Good lord, I know that one of my Christmas wishes was more blog fodder that I could write about but this is a bit ridiculous. Now, if you think that this is some sort of racist post then think again. Richmond has many different types of drivers and I’m calling ALL of them bad drivers.

Over the holidays, Cheryl and I moved back to Richmond so that we could tear down and rebuild our house (more on that in a later blog post).

My 15 minute commute has now officially turned into a 30+ minute commute to work. Now rush hour in Richmond is a different type of hell on Earth, if you think that losing a child or seeing your 2 month old puppy get kicked in the face with a steel toe boot is hell then you obviously haven’t driven a car on Number 3 road in Richmond during rush hour.

This morning a middle aged woman driving to work in a Civic could not observe proper traffic etiquette and let other drivers merge into the highway (she kept closing off the space as to not let anyone in). I also saw her slam her breaks (completely unaware of any other cars around her)  in an attempt to merge further than everyone else when she exited the highway into Marine Drive.

Now to the people who are going to say, “Well Ritchie the Canada Line is there now and you can just take the Transit all the way to work.” To you I say, Transit is like allowing a bunch of sick, sweaty and bodily odor-ridden strangers to violate your own personal space. It’s practically a step below rape!

1:03 pm 4 Comments

Cheryl vs. Twilight 2: New Moon

You’re probably expecting a movie review of New Moon on this blog post right? Wrong!

My wife, Cheryl, is a twilight fan. She read the books, got hooked, watched the movie, got more hooked and now she’s obsessed. If we have a child, and that child is pale with bejeweled skin then I’m marching over to Stephanie Meyer’s house and punching her in the face.

Last month, I made her a bet. On November 19th, if she doesn’t watch Twilight for a year then I would buy her any purse. Yes, you read that correctly: ANY purse. No limits on price, no limits of what type, any purse. As long as she doesn’t watch ANY Twilight movie for a year (November 2009 – November 2010).

I’d start taking bets but she’s not decided on taking my dare.

10:00 am 3 Comments

Dear ABC TV Network, You suck!

Dear ABC,

Let me first say that I hate you for turning me into the livid old man that writes crazy letters to companies. You’re not the first but by expanding from one to two companies, I don’t have a guarantee that it will not happen again. Damn you.

Now onto business, your abrupt stop to Pushing Daisies was a horrible thing to do. It was the equivalent of writing [atom bomb detonates and kills all characters] in the script. I screamed at the TV during the last minute of the last episode. Not fun for TV watchers, it’s the emotional equivalent of stealing a baby’s blankie. You just stole a cute baby’s blankie ABC!

I’d also like to say that because you cancelled Pushing Daisies, Anna Friel (who plays Chuck) did Land of the Lost. Horrible movie! All. your. fault!

You know World Hunger? Yea. That’s your fault too ABC!

Kind Regards,

Ritchie

p.s. Bring back Pushing Daisies!

9:30 am 2 Comments

Ritchie vs. Fame (2009): The Movie

First of all, a Fame remake is a good idea in theory. However, like all good ‘theory’ ideas (Ronco Pocket Fisherman, I’m looking at you!) most times execution fails horribly. There are spoilers in this post, so if you’re planning to see the movie (God help you) then stop reading this. Here is the premise:

Put a bunch of artsy kids into a NYC artsy school with strict instructors. Mix in a classically trained pianist who happens to be African American, token Asian girl struggling artist, nerdy geek film producer, So you think you can dance finalist and angry African American man with stereotypical upbringing and you have Fame (that or a really bad Benetton ad).

Now, let me say that in my years of teaching at an art school things like random singing, dancing, rapping and tap dancing doesn’t randomly break out in the halls (or even the cafeteria). Mostly, sleeping and stressing out about assignments and exams. It just doesn’t happen.

The typical angry African American youth story line with inspiring adult is a bit old. It’s been done and has been beaten with a stick. That horse ain’t walkin’ no more. No. Seriously. Stop it.

The “classically trained pianist gives up her years of training to be an R&B signer” storyline was incredibly stupid. I would imagine that, to be that good at piano, you’d have to invest years into the art. A singer, I would also imagine, requires a similar amount of years invested (read: not just 3 years of high school, regardless of how well you can belt out Out Here On My Own).

To the children out there. Stay in school! Don’t drop out of high school because you get a chance at a recurring role in Sesame Street. No seriously, Ms Anna Maria Perez de Tagle; Its an embarrassment to your Filipino heritage. If her parents were as crazy as mine, every 2nd phrase you heard should’ve been “Do your homework” or “Be a doctor”. I think it’s official: proximity to Miley Cirus decreases your overall IQ points.

<sarcasm>Overall, I loved the movie.</sarcasm> It might be worth the watch to see Megan Mullally sing (I think she does actually sing). The soundtrack is decent (if you like crappy music like me) and the movie offers a good vehicle for the soundtrack. However having the soundtrack play in the background is way better than wasting two hours of your life in a movie theater. Serves me right for watching something that has a 29% on Rotten Tomatoes.

9:00 am 0 Comments